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FK Your Diet

Written By Scott Joseph On November 12, 2020

If you can get past the name, you’ll find some pretty good food at FK Your Diet, a Fort Myers/Cape Coral restaurant that recently opened an Orlando location in SoSoDo. It’s a breakfast and lunch eatery that features conventional dishes with creative twists served in copious portions.

But there is that name.

Technically, the F and K are meant to stand for Foster Kid. The concept’s owner, Doug Miller, grew up as a foster child and has dedicated his business to help children in similar situations, pledging a portion of the restaurants’ proceeds to the cause. Admirable.

But Foster Kid Your Diet doesn’t make any sense. FK Your Diet does as crude shorthand. This restaurant isn’t the only nor the first to resort to tongue-in-cheek uncouthness. The popular sandwich shop Bad As’s apparently thinks a well-placed apostrophe makes it more G-rated. And it’s not just independently owned local restaurants, either. The British owner of French Connection clothing retailer boldly uses FCUK as its logo. Not very subtle.

But I’m guessing it’s only those of us of a certain age, those who remember when television was scandalized the first time Johnny Carson said hell on The Tonight Show, will raise a prudish eyebrow.

And like I said, get past it and enjoy some good food.

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I recently ordered breakfast and enjoyed it very much. And I enjoyed the leftovers even more. These are Bubble Room sized portions. (That’s a reference for those old enough to get the vapors from a swear word.) Ordering, by the way, was a pleasant experience over the phone. And when I arrived in front of the restaurant, painted in all manor of Day-Glo colors, someone was bringing the order out even before I could put my car in park.

The breakfast menu features familiar items as well as stylized versions. For instance, there are several variations on eggs Benedict, all called Bennys (though surprisingly no omelets). I chose the It’s All Gravy Benny, which featured a sausage-heavy gravy served on top of flaky biscuits instead of muffins with sausage patties standing in for ham. The menu noted that they were served with over-medium eggs, but mine came poached instead with only the whites surrounding the still-runny yolks attached. Someone in the kitchen knows how to properly poach eggs. And it was nice that the gravy was served separately so I could spoon it over the benny concoction at home where it wouldn’t get too soggy.

I thought another container with my order was a brown gravy meant for my companion’s Fuzzy Breakfast Sandwich, a curiously named concoction of a biscuit filled with scrambled eggs (which looked more like a large omelet, so there’s that), with melted cheddar cheese and a sausage patty (you can have bacon, ham or chorizo if you’d rather). The menu description didn’t mention a gravy, but what else could it be for?

But just before I started pouring it over the sandwich, I gave it a little taste and realized it was actually the frosting for the cinnamon roll I had also ordered. Disaster averted. And it turned out I didn’t have to call the restaurant to let them know they’d left the frosting out of my order. But in my defense, the brown liquid did not look like cream cheese frosting.

But the sweet goo accented the sugary roll just fine. (One of the takeout containers had “We love you” written on it. A note on the glazing would have been appreciated, too.)

Both breakfast items came with ample amounts of fried potatoes. You can have fresh fruit if you’d prefer, but at this point you might as well do as the restaurant’s name says.

And as for those who still can’t bring themselves to patronize a restaurant that winks a vulgar term, I say foster kid ‘em if they can’t take a joke.

FK Your Diet is at 5406 Hansel Ave., Orlando (map). It is open for breakfast and lunch daily. Outdoor dining is available. The phone number is 407-674-7710.

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